Eggshell:  Hey Whiteglossy, check this out.  All I can say is ewwww.

Whiteglossy:  I don’t know, I think you should be saying Moooo.

condoms

Bill Gates, inventor of most things great, has issued a challenge through the Gates Foundation by offering a grant to the group that could improve on current condom design to increase pleasure, and thus increase use.  Unless they invented a condom that feels like the inside of a vagina, I think this is a lost cause.

However, one team actually came up with something.  We like to refer to it as meat for your meat, slapping some beef on your rod, or making your tube steak a double.  What are all these meat related puns referring too you might ask yourself?  Well, the one design is a condom made out of cow tendons.  More specifically the collagen that can be extracted from the cow tendons.  Frankly, I’m sitting here wondering if these are vegan friendly?

“A lot people are trying to get stronger and thinner material—that was always my focus,” grant winner Mark McGlothlin told The New Republic. “But the texture of collagen is very much like the mucous membrane: The feel of it, the heat transfer of it, and to the touch, it feels very much like skin”

I’m sorry Mark, you lost me at mucous membrane. But either way, if science can come up with a way to make these better feeling and encourage more use, then I’m all for it.  I’m a strong believer in strapping up until you are ready for the commitment.  I just don’t know if I will be able to throw one of these on and not think of what it used to be.

Which brings up another point, instead of calling it a rubber, is it now called an  udder?