There’s only two types of people who wear sunglasses indoors.  Blind people and assholes.  Now you can add people who own Maui Jim’s.

Corey Hart and Huey Lewis feel me because our future’s are so bright we gotta wear shades and sunglasses at night…so I can…so I can.  I seriously put these things on and instantly become more attractive, more affluent and can hand a 7 ft man an ass whoopin’.  Basically sporting these gives you the mind frame/feeling you’re about 7 beers deep.

I am, of course, talking to you about Maui Jim Lighthouse (LSU Style) Sunglasses ($170).  These shades work double duty (heehee I said duty) as I sport them both casually and athletically.  They’re so freaking comfortable and light I rock them while running too.  The glasses are super lightweight, I mean super lightweight like Nicole Richie wet holding a 25 lb plate (for the algebraically challenged that’s a total of 50 lbs if you carry the 1 x pi 3.14.) They firmly grasp my little face and temples making a perfect fit in place of my previous running shades made by Fike (altered for legal sake).  Plus they don’t look like running glasses to where you wouldn’t be caught dead in them outside of a marathon.

I first sought these out because they are tailored to the colors of your favorite collegiate team which include: screw your favorite team it should be LSU Tigers!! But here are the others for you puds: Alabama, Auburn, Clemson, Florida, Florida St, Michigan, UofMiami, Tennessee, Austin and Georgia. The box that cases the shades are also decked out in your team’s colors.

Sweet case too, smells good….you know what I’m talking about when new things smell great. Inside you’ll find a cleaning cloth with team logo too.  Uses of the cloth include clearing your lenses from fingerprints, mushroom stamps, jizz, Mr. T saliva and a diaper for a very small butt.   I’m a pessimist and I can’t stand change and I don’t give two shits if you agree with me or not so there’s no reason for fabrication…..these shades truly are awesome.

A+ Maui Jim, A+.

Here is some of the detailed specs from the Brahs at Maui Jim:


Maui Jim debuts its new college-branded line of sunglasses for 11 of America’s top universities. For each participating school, sunglasses feature frames in the schools’ colors along with school-branded cleaning cloths and sunglass cases. Glasses are available at participating college bookstores or optical stores around participating universities. University of Alabama, Florida State, Auburn, Clemson, University of Florida, University of Georgia, University of Michigan, Louisiana State, University of Miami, University of Tennessee and University of Texas at Austin.

The new line uses high performance, unisex designs that are some of Maui Jim’s best sellers, customized in fun school colors, including Lighthouse, Breakwall, Ho’Okipa and Makaha. All these styles are made from light weight, durable nylon or Grilamid. Three lens colors – Neutral Grey for bright sun, HCL® Bronze for variable light conditions and Maui HT™, an all-around lens or for dark, foggy days – are offered in the collection. Each school has chosen frames and lens colors that best match the style of their students and alumni.

“We previewed these glasses at select events over the past month,” said Maui Jim’s Vice President of Marketing, Linda Glassel. “These glasses are the best of both worlds – they offer great eye protection, as well as a big dose of school spirit.”

All Maui Jim’s lenses feature the company’s proprietary PolarizedPlus®2 technology that reduces 99.9 percent of harmful glare and cuts UV rays by 100 percent. Each lens features nine layers of protection, as well as unique, bi-gradient mirror technology, to eliminate eye fatigue – basically, the glasses squint for the wearer.

PolarizedPlus®2 not only reduces glare, but also produces true, vivid colors. With Maui Jim lenses, blues are bluer. Greens are more vivid. Reds are vibrant. Yellows pop. Whites are true. This is because the company uses three rare earth elements on its lenses which, when combined with the glare-eliminating elements of each lens, result in significantly truer colors.

All Maui Jim sunglasses use unique waterproof and oleophobic coatings to repel water and grease, and make smudges and fingerprints easier to wipe away – on both inside and outside surfaces. Clearshell® scratch-resistant technology on the Polycarbonate lenses helps them perform better for longer – which means clearer sight.

About Maui Jim, Inc.

Maui Jim began as one man selling sunglasses on the beaches of Maui, Hawaii, back in the early 1980s. As local demand grew for sunglasses that provided advanced protection from the severe glare and UV rays of the Hawaiian sun – without distorting the beautiful colors of the Islands – the company developed proprietary technology – PolarizedPlus®, which was later patented and subsequently enhanced to create the company’s newest technology, PolarizedPlus®2. Maui Jim was “born” with an original line of seven sunglass styles. Up to 1991, the sunglasses were exclusively sold in Maui, Hawaii. In 1991, the company was purchased by Hester Enterprises, and in 1994, Hester enlisted RLI Vision Corporation of Peoria, Illinois, to be the mainland distributor of Maui Jim Sunglasses for the ophthalmic market. Maui Jim, Inc. was established in December 1996, when Maui Jim Sunglasses acquired RLI Vision. Today, the company sells more than 86 styles and 200 SKUs and is the fastest growing polarized sunglass